Today I woke up crying, It was a dream a little bit fantastic. I was in a perfect world, Ashlee Simpson was my mother I thought. Christmas was coming, I've never lived Christmas in winter, so it was funny. All the bells tinkering, it was more than happy. I remember someone saying we couldn't stay there much time, It hurt.

I asked,

- Will you clean up all this stuff?

- Of course I will.

They "didn't remember anything", but I did. It was horrible, never again. Perfection is not real, never, and I was thinking about that, then I started crying, and woke up. 

After that, family fights, that's the worst. Even worse than love. Omg. I can't feel this anymore.