5.30.2009

It does not seem that fair when it hurts yourself, I won't do that again. I didn't really, if you thought I meant that kind of things, you were right, at first, say goodbye. It's too hard to realize, you were playing like a fass, well I know I'll be allright, "It's just I don't have the time".

5.18.2009

In my eyes you can see I'm like floating up stream, every cloud has always a silver lining, always, I can swear you, this is the best feeling. My cheeks turn red, this is love, beautiful sound, clear sight, perfect eyes, I like seeing myself fly. The sky is red, the roses blue, the perfect smile in your face, it's just you. This romantic style getting me up, pulling they down, but I don't care anymore, It's just me and you, nothing else, nothing to say, nothing to do, we belong to each other.  

5.17.2009

I want to skip everything we think, because that's not necessary, even though you don't believe it. So kiss me, that's not that hard, if you knew how I wish your wandering mouth, your lips, it's like a fruit machine, but you're going to bet soon, and I need you.
 
"It's 5 o'clock in the morning, conversation got boring, you said you're going to bed soon , so I snuck off to your bedroom. And I thought I'd just wait there, 'til I heard you come up the stairs. I pretended I was sleeping, and I was hoping you would creep in, with me. You put your arm around my shoulder, it was as if the room got colder, we moved closer in together and started talking about the weather. Said tomorrow would be fun, we can watch A Place In The Sun. I didn't know where this was going, when you kissed me.And today you accidentally called me baby. Are you mine? Are you mine? 'Cause I stay here all the time, watching telly, drinking wine. Who'da known?, who'da known? When you flash up on my phone, I'd no longer feel alone. Let's just stay, let's just stay, I wanna lie in bed all day. We'll be laughing all the way, told your friends, they all know, we exist but we're taking it slow"

And all the things we are going to live, if you knew how I wish, and all the things that I can see, oh my dear, I think I deserve this, please don't make me cry.

5.10.2009

I wasn't born for this, but I know have to stand like I was 2 days ago, oh my god. It's hard, because I'm going nowhere, and I'm getting lost, more and more each day, and this is painful and at the time beautiful.
I'm forgiving, that's not okay. I have to put my sense clear. And even though I think sometimes it's too late to let myself, I've to do my last try, the last chance, because sometimes I guess it's enough late to regret about it, because all the plastic, It's all fantastic, but I can't take this anymore, no.

5.08.2009

Believe me when I say it's true.

You always trusted me,
they always warned me,
but I've never wanted to hear.
How could I forget everything you touch then?
Then I'll be more careful, this time
It was annoying, you had always won.
This kind of hurting, you don't know by now


But you know?
I'll break you whoa, I'll break you.
I won't give a damn, never, and
from now on I'll always get what I want, I wanted
and you'll fall down, whoa, you'll fall down,
and I'll be enjoying on it, I'll be glad.


Now I regret, everything I gave to you
and have to let you save it
cause this will be worse 
than anything you've ever dreamed
oh wait, not that long, you'll see

I'll break you whoa, I'll break you.
I won't give a damn, never, and
from now on I'll always get what I want
and you'll fall down, whoa, you'll fall down,
and I'll be enjoying on it, poor empty girl.


What you did to me it was so painful,
I was hurting myself, suffering much than I could ever take
but you'll take all the blame,
believe me when I say It's true.

I'll break you whoa, I'll break you.
I won't give a damn, never, and
from now on I'll always get what I want
and you'll fall down, whoa, you'll fall down,
and I'll be enjoying on it, I'll be..

Oh my god, I was wasting my tears, this is mad enough.

5.04.2009

These days were a bit hard, I know all this, this is all going to make me cry again, but anyway, now I'm happy by myself. This is more than great, I'm feel so um..., overrated?
I'm looking for a place to stay, somewhere in your heart, that'll be more than just fine. If I could cry, I cried in front of your face, you'll see my brown eyes, they'll be so wet, oh my god, I think I have to, it could help you to forget. 
Then when the sun goes down, I can see my moon shine, and when the clouds are coming, well I know I'll see my raindrops flying, trying to write my name falling down the sky. When the stars fall down, I'll see the red ones tinkering as I smile, our honeymoon, that was so alive. You couldn't see the sun bright, but you've seen the rain coming down to us, the water wetting us, we were so alive. I can't say anything but, when he dies, it will be too late, we'll be unitedly forever, our oceanstate. 

5.02.2009

Rain falling again, tears running on my face, pain growing everyday, don't know why. I still ask, was it needed that way on hurt?
Oh my gosh, I'll crush. Oh my gosh, I'll die. Cold again. Feel like cry.

Stop with all this, let's be clear.

You said you wouldn't hurt me again, but you do it. You know, I NEED THIS MORE THAN ANYTHING. WHY? WHY ME? WHY YOUR RIGHT-HAND? WHY? AFTER EVERYTHING I DID BECAUSE OF YOU, ALL THE PAIN I HAD GOT WHEN YOU WERE GONE? AFTER THAT, YOU STILL HURT, AND WHEN I THINK ALL COULD BE OVER, FORGET YOU, SAY GOODNIGHT & GOODBYE, FOREVER, I CAN'T. Because I still love you, omg I still love you. But I can't feel this anymore, please God, I can not.
I ain't solves, I just fall, in the deepest hole, there's no stop. When do you think this is going to end? When I finally lay falling off, and let my body crush, and give up all the suffering, and the end... of everything.
Today I woke up crying, It was a dream a little bit fantastic. I was in a perfect world, Ashlee Simpson was my mother I thought. Christmas was coming, I've never lived Christmas in winter, so it was funny. All the bells tinkering, it was more than happy. I remember someone saying we couldn't stay there much time, It hurt.
I asked,
- Will you clean up all this stuff?
- Of course I will.

They "didn't remember anything", but I did. It was horrible, never again. Perfection is not real, never, and I was thinking about that, then I started crying, and woke up. 
After that, family fights, that's the worst. Even worse than love. Omg. I can't feel this anymore.

5.01.2009

If something is not fine, look at the sky, you'll see something it could help to cry. If something shouldn't be like that, just left everything you've got, be a free dove, run away from all, get far from cold. 
Don't try to tell me what to do, don't try to tell me what to say, don't try to tell me anything, I'm sick of that, just kiss me, it all will be more than fine. You think that I can let you go, but what happen when you can't let the pain grow? When you're more than cold? When you find that velvet place, your never ending days? If you're sad, I'll cry for you. If you can't breathe, I'll breath for you, but if you can't stay, don't ask me to leave you again.
What would you do if your reason for being didn't want you anymore. Would you still risk everything to save them? Raise your hands and try touching the sky, and when you do it you'll notice there's never been a sky to fly, there's no sparkle in their eyes and you've ever lived a dream, because life is such a very real, pretty clear, belief. Raise your hands up in the air and look up for the missing stars, that died yesterday in our twilight night, you were one, little piece of sharp, super-cold sparkle light.

When someone left you, when someone is gone, when you can't find a reason, when you felt so strong and now you know that you're not. You feel cold, all's done, but you never thought about it, you can't believe it at first, but it's the truth, he's not. 
I don't want to get depressed, I would like to be there. My head crushes itself to see if there're more answers than a poor fight. I am looking for the high light, going to be the mirror. Velvet place, never ending days.
I saw this coming, in a way.
I saw this coming, in a way.
Something is wrong, something is the reason of the troubles, something is wrong, someone wants revenge, of what? I don't know, but the ending is coming. My soul will fall apart, but I'm not afraid, you are the ones that should be frightened of my death.
 
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